I know how you feel. You look at everyone around you. You see their lives full of nice things, great relationships and talents that bless so many. In you, the feelings of worthlessness and shame dominate. Your soul often feels bankrupt and low on reserves. As much as you want to give and bless others, you feel stuck unable to navigate the emptiness of blessing that dominates you.
Today I was reading the story of a widow, who in the time of Jesus approached the temple offering box and gave her offering to God.  Not knowing that Jesus was sitting nearby watching, she placed in the temple treasury two small worthless coins that at the time added 1/8th of 1 cent. The others who came that day placed in far more. As Jesus watched the widow make her donation, he commented to those with him that she put in “more than all of them” because she gave not out of her abundance, but all she had.
I’ve read this story many times and for some reason it’s always troubled me. Perhaps because pastors have used this passage to place guilt upon their patrons to give all they have for their next “building campaign” or church budget. Today however as I read this story something different struck me and it has nothing to do with giving money to a church.
For many first responders and those who have dealt with trauma that has ripped their soul in two, we are left to feel we have nothing to give others or God. Our souls often feel bankrupt and devoid of anything of value. As much as we long to be a blessing to others around us, we feel nothing but a curse and a deposit of things no one wants. If we made a list of what we had to give, it would look much like the following:
- Worry about what others think of us
- Fear of how we’ll make it through the day
- Anger we have a hard time controlling
- Anxiety that riddles the core of all we know
- Confusion about why we are the way we are
- Feelings of brokenness
- Regret from our past
- Shame that screams feelings of worthlessness
- Feelings of failure and never being enough
For those of us who often struggle mentally, we’re left to feel a deep divide in our souls that leaves us longing to have more to give than we feel we do.
Let me ask you a question.
What if the offering we gave God and others today wasn’t a large sum of money or a portion of a talent we have plenty of, but a heart that came pour in spirit longing to be healed? What if our donation to God, a list of stuff no one around us wants, was enough? What if Jesus sat and watched us place that list into God’s treasury and said of us, “truly, I tell you, they have put in more than all the rest?”
Perhaps for those of us today that are willing to come to God real, raw and unpolished, we’ll find not an angry God who demands more of our money, but a God who is full of compassion and grace longing to bring healing to the depths of our hearts and minds.
What if the only thing we had to offer today, our brokenness, was enough? What if that offering brought great joy to the heart of God?
“Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.” – Matthew 5:3
Go make a great offering today by giving God all you have, even if it’s a list of broken and hurting things. Let me know how this has helped you. Send me an email, post a comment or share with a friend.
 Luke 21:1-4